In October of 2006, a milkman by the name of Charles Carl Roberts lost all reason and control. Blaming God for the death of his first child, he stormed into an Amish school without any provocation, released the boys and adults, and tied up 10 girls. He shot the girls, killing five and wounding five. Then he took his own life.
Should this have happened to me, I would have been angry, bitter and unforgiving, but the Amish response was quite different. While there was great anguish, there was no anger; while there was hurt, there was no hate—only forgiveness. They reached out to the milkman’s suffering family, visiting them with words of forgiveness, help, and love. Many Amish attended the milkman’s funeral and an invitation was extended to his family to likewise attend the funeral services of the girls who had been killed.
A local resident said of the events: “We were all speaking the same language, and not just English, but a language of caring, a language of community, a language of service, and, yes, a language of forgiveness.” (“After That Tragic Day, a Deeper Respect among English, Amish?” Sunday News, Oct. 15, 2006, p. A1)
I can’t imagine a better example of the Savior’s teaching we often refer to as The Sermon on the Mount: “Do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you” (Matthew 5:44). Interestingly, as we have faith in God, trust in His word, and strive to develop this same spirit of forgiveness, not only do we become His disciples but we actually receive blessings!
What happens when we develop forgiveness in our hearts towards those that have given us offense?
To answer this we look no further than the following definition of forgiveness by Dr. Sidney Simon, a noted expert on values and relationships. He explains this in his definition of forgiveness: “Forgiveness is freeing up and putting to better use the energy once consumed by holding grudges, harboring resentments and nursing unhealed wounds. It is rediscovering the strengths we always had and relocating our limitless capacity to understand and accept other people and ourselves.”
I am not sure about you, but I have been known to hold a grudge. Some of us can hold grudges for a lifetime, never once stopping to think that forgiving those who have wronged us can be wholesome and therapeutic. One recent study showed that people who are taught to forgive become “less angry, more hopeful, less depressed, less anxious and less stressed” (Fred Luskin, Carrie A. Moore, “Learning to Forgive,” Deseret Morning News, Oct. 7, 2006). By forgiving others, we are actually giving ourselves the gift of liberation.
Forgiveness may not be that easy at first, but if we, like the Amish, have faith in God and trust in His word, it will enable us to look beyond ourselves, to forgive, and to free ourselves of unneeded burden.
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